Post by brassmonkey on Jul 24, 2009 20:42:51 GMT -5
Written by my buddy over at The Daily Nigger. Relax! He's black!
Hi There! Please Bend Over While I Shove This Hot Poker Up Your Ass.
By NNIC | July 24, 2009 - 12:04 pm - Posted in Free Speech
You see, that wasn’t so bad after all! I bet you would even say it felt kind of good. After all, you can’t say that it didn’t feel good because I am the first black president, and case closed. If you do not agree with me then you are a goddam racist. That goes for the police and everybody else . . . except if I happen to be caught breaking into the White House. Then they will shoot me. Yep, I am the first victim president, and you can’t say that I have done anything wrong.
And just to prove that I am a victim, I’ve got all the media believing me and taking up my case and shutting down anything even remotely discouraging. I have reporters coming into the White House all the time and photographing me and taking notes, and every one of them loves me. They think I am great. The reason is because if they don’t think I’m great then they are essentially tearing down their corporate image. And that wouldn’t be good, would it!
And so you can’t shit about me because I’m black, and I’m a victim, and the media says so too. So fuck all of you. I’ve got great health insurance for me and my family forever and ever. You don’t have shit, and what little you do have I’m going to make you share it with everybody else because I want you to think that I really care about you. Don’t you see? Can you see what I’m saying to you now?
I’m a pretender, motherf**k*rs. I’m just up here reading lines on that fucking teleprompter. And those reporters are just people they stick out there for me to call on and ask them planted questions. Hell, I already have the damn answers, so what’s the point of being up there doing this shit in the first place? Because my massa told me to get my high yellow ass up there and do what I got’s to do to show that I believe in everyday people so that Goldman Sachs, AIG, and the unions get paid off and nobody says a word.
When will you f**k*rs ever wake up? Don’t you think that I hate being here in the massa’s house? Can’t you see that I really honestly don’t like reading this shit to you, but I really don’t have any choice. You are losing your fucking jobs. Unemployment is getting worse. The stock market is going higher, and you are getting fucked. But you can’t say anything because I am a victim and THERE. Case closed. Now shut the fuck up while I shove this hot poker up your ass one more time.
And to show you how stupid I am, I went and pissed off the po-lice. And now I can’t really go anywhere because I can’t be sure if they have my back any more. Shit! Now I’m really fucked. Hell, the massa might have to send my ass back into the field. Uh oh, I’m in big trouble now.
Sincerely,
Your first half-black President.
Hi There! Please Bend Over While I Shove This Hot Poker Up Your Ass.
By NNIC | July 24, 2009 - 12:04 pm - Posted in Free Speech
You see, that wasn’t so bad after all! I bet you would even say it felt kind of good. After all, you can’t say that it didn’t feel good because I am the first black president, and case closed. If you do not agree with me then you are a goddam racist. That goes for the police and everybody else . . . except if I happen to be caught breaking into the White House. Then they will shoot me. Yep, I am the first victim president, and you can’t say that I have done anything wrong.
And just to prove that I am a victim, I’ve got all the media believing me and taking up my case and shutting down anything even remotely discouraging. I have reporters coming into the White House all the time and photographing me and taking notes, and every one of them loves me. They think I am great. The reason is because if they don’t think I’m great then they are essentially tearing down their corporate image. And that wouldn’t be good, would it!
And so you can’t shit about me because I’m black, and I’m a victim, and the media says so too. So fuck all of you. I’ve got great health insurance for me and my family forever and ever. You don’t have shit, and what little you do have I’m going to make you share it with everybody else because I want you to think that I really care about you. Don’t you see? Can you see what I’m saying to you now?
I’m a pretender, motherf**k*rs. I’m just up here reading lines on that fucking teleprompter. And those reporters are just people they stick out there for me to call on and ask them planted questions. Hell, I already have the damn answers, so what’s the point of being up there doing this shit in the first place? Because my massa told me to get my high yellow ass up there and do what I got’s to do to show that I believe in everyday people so that Goldman Sachs, AIG, and the unions get paid off and nobody says a word.
When will you f**k*rs ever wake up? Don’t you think that I hate being here in the massa’s house? Can’t you see that I really honestly don’t like reading this shit to you, but I really don’t have any choice. You are losing your fucking jobs. Unemployment is getting worse. The stock market is going higher, and you are getting fucked. But you can’t say anything because I am a victim and THERE. Case closed. Now shut the fuck up while I shove this hot poker up your ass one more time.
And to show you how stupid I am, I went and pissed off the po-lice. And now I can’t really go anywhere because I can’t be sure if they have my back any more. Shit! Now I’m really fucked. Hell, the massa might have to send my ass back into the field. Uh oh, I’m in big trouble now.
Sincerely,
Your first half-black President.
